The Unexpected Solution To Shyness, Timidity, and Self-Consciousness
Who Was Orison Swett Marden?
Wikpedia describes him like this, “Dr. Orison Swett Marden was an American inspirational author who wrote on success in life and how to achieve it. His writings discuss common-sense principles and virtues that make for a well-rounded, successful life.”
He wrote a famous book called “Pushing to the Front” in 1894.
It became the single greatest runaway classic in the history of personal development books at that time.
Wikipedia states this about the book, “American presidents William McKinley and Theodore Roosevelt, as well as England’s Prime Minister William Gladstone, praised the book. People like Henry Ford, Thomas Edison, Harvey Firestone and J. P. Morgan cited it as inspiration.”
In the book he reveals some interesting insights into self-consciousness, timidity, and shyness.
Below are his insights…
The Problem Shy and Timid People Have
Timid, shy people are morbidly self-conscious; they think too much about themselves.
Their thoughts are always turned inward; they are always analyzing, dissecting themselves, wondering how they appear and what people think of them.
If these people could only forget themselves and think of others, they would be surprised to see what freedom, ease, and grace they would gain; what success in life they would achieve.
Timidity, shyness, and self-consciousness belong to the same family.
We usually find all where we find any one of these qualities, and they are all enemies of peace of mind, happiness, and achievement.
No one has ever done a great thing while his mind was centered upon himself.
We must lose ourselves before we can find ourselves.
Self analysis is valuable only to learn our strength; fatal, if we dwell upon our weaknesses.
Thousands of young people are held back from undertaking what they long to do, and are kept from trying to make real their great life-dreams, because they are afraid to jostle with the world.
They shrink from exposing their sore spots and sensitive points, which smart from the lightest touch.
Their super-sensitiveness makes cowards of them.
His Solution?
“What shall I do to get rid of it?” asks a victim.
Think less of yourself and more of others.
Mingle freely with people. Become interested in things outside of yourself.
Do not brood over what is said to you, or analyze every simple remark until you magnify it into something of the greatest importance.
Do not have such a low and unjust estimate of people as to think they are bent on nothing but hurting the feelings of others, and depreciating and making light of them on every possible occasion.
A man who appreciates himself at his true value, and who gives his neighbors credit for being at least as good as he is, cannot be a victim of over-sensitiveness.
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If you have been feeling like your shyness and timidness have been holding you back in life, then I would encourage you to take his advice: begin to focus on and think more about others than yourself.
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