BBH Feature: What If Your Life Really Is As Good As It Looks On Facebook?
I came across an interesting story about two twin boys.
One of the twins was an incurable optimist.
The other twin was a continual pessimist.
They both were so extreme that their parents were worried about the extremes of behavior and attitude, so they finally took the boys in to see a psychologist.
The psychologist observed them for a while and then said that they could be easily helped.
He gave the parents this strange advice, “Fill one room in your house with all the toys a boy could want, then put the twin who is a pessimist in that room and allow him to enjoy life.”
Then he said, “Fill another room in your house with horse manure, then put your son who is the optimist in that room.”
It was the strangest advice they had ever heard, but they were desperate, financially well-off, and willing to try anything, so they did it.
But in addition to following the psychologist’s advice, they had one way mirrors installed in each room, so they could observe both boys.
One day they were observing the boys with the psychologist and they couldn’t believe what they were seeing…
The pessimist – in a room full of toys – continued to be a pessimist, stating that he had no one to play with.
After seeing this, they went to look in on the optimist and were astounded to find him digging through the manure.
The psychologist ran into the room and asked the boy, “What on earth are you doing? Why are you digging in that pile of manure?”
The boy replied, “With all this manure, I am sure there has to be a pony in the room somewhere!”
Facebook Depression
I have seen multiple articles that claim that Facebook is making us depressed and sad about our lives.
Why?
A Reuters article said, “Witnessing friends’ vacations, love lives and work successes on Facebook can cause envy and trigger feelings of misery and loneliness, according to German researchers.”
The article later stated, “The spread and ubiquitous presence of envy on Social Networking Sites is shown to undermine users’ life satisfaction.“
The reality seems to be that our friends are only posting all of the good things that are happening in their lives.
Their lives look perfect and amazing, because we don’t see and hear all of the junk that they’re going through.
That’s why after being on Facebook for a period of time many people are left wondering, “Why is everyone else’s life so much better than mine?”
But this got me thinking: What if we’re using Facebook in the wrong way?
What If Your Life Really Is as Good as It Looks on Facebook?
What if our problem is the same as that pessimistic twin boy in the story above?
What if we are just focusing on the wrong things?
I have a suggestion.
Instead of obsessing about all of the good things that are happening in our friend’s lives, maybe we should read some of OUR OWN status updates more.
Have you ever realized that some friends have been reading your updates and they’re jealous?
Yes, of YOUR life.
They have seen all of your positive updates and they think your life seems pretty great.
It feels better than all of the junk they’re going through.
We write out all of these amazing things on Facebook that happen regularly in our lives, but then we forget about them and focus on all of the junk and the problems.
What if we instead started focusing on all the amazing, “Facebook-worthy” things that are happening in our lives?
The Right Way to Use Facebook
My suggestion is that you continue posting about all of the fun and great things that are happening in your life.
But don’t do it to make your friends jealous.
Do it as a way to remember just how great life really is.
Use your Facebook statuses as your “Thankful Journal”.
Instead of spending all of your time on Facebook reading about other people’s lives, spend some of the time marveling at the amazing things that have happened in your life this year.
And even when you read about the hard things that have happened, marvel that you made it through!
Because these are the two facts that you need to always remember:
1. Everyone else’s lives are really not as amazing as they look on Facebook.
2. Your life is so much better than you’ve led yourself to believe.
And when you catch yourself comparing your life to a friend’s “amazing” life, remember these words from Regina Brett, a long-time columnist for Ohio newspapers, who recorded this lesson below as one of her “45 Life Lessons”…
“If we all threw our problems in a pile and saw everyone else’s, we’d grab ours back.”
Photo by Dimitris Kalogeropoylos
Related article
- Expert Feature: Is Your Facebook Page Losing Its Organic Reach? (baybusinesshelp.com)
